Attention, puzzlers:

I know you—in fact, I'm one of you. You see a grid and you can't resist diving in.

However, if you have yet to read Perfect on Paper, the theme—not to mention several of the clues—will make absolutely no sense.

And bear in mind, the constructor is none other than the formidable W.W.W. Moody. Consider yourself warned.

in printable PDF format
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and go right to the solution!